This is an evidence based statement by Dr. Daniel Siegel. I love this because it speaks to the effectiveness of the groups we do. When people have a safe place to talk about their experience around their grief, they can hold it better. It is through the conversation that we expand our capacity to experience our emotions. Oh my there are so many emotions.

Have you ever seen the feelings wheel? I think there are over 100 emotions listed there. Emotions are more nuanced than we realize until we start talking about them. For example, anger – are you angry, or are you frustrated, or are you hurt? There are more words that can be related to anger. Or sadness – are you sad, or are you empty, or are you disappointed? Or we could talk about fear – are you afraid, or do you feel helpless, or are you anxious?

My point is that there are many different layers to our emotions. It is through talking about them that we can find the correct language. If we can name it, we can tame it. We can hold it in a way that doesn’t overwhelm us.

This is why we say that we grieve in community. This is why we encourage people to join our groups. Through discussion we can find the language that helps you with your unique grief journey.

We have started a new Tea Time for the Soul Group. The afternoon group is overflowing now. We see a need to create a new space and time for a drop in. We have seen that when we have smaller groups, the people who are in the group have more space to be able to talk and to explore. This is the work of grieving.

Our new group is every Wednesday morning from 10:00 am to 12:00 pm. We ask that you pre-register by calling us at 250-563-2551. My hope is that you have someone that you can have these kinds of conversations with. That you give yourself permission to find the language that works best for you.

Above all else, be gentle.

Denise Torgerson
Community Programs